So, Brandon and I were asked to sing in church, which we did last Sunday. It has been a while since I've sung and I think I've lost my touch. Not that I don't sing in front of a large group every Sunday, but it's the Primary children and really I'm not singing. I'm cheerleading. Not really challenging or embarrassing. I've just totally lost my confidence and it's been really hard for me.
Anyway, today I went to our ward choir practice (8:30 am!!) and then to the Stake choir practice for the Forgotten Carols. I really debated trying out for a specific part and then Brandon got called to be the EQP and I figured we had enough on our plate. Now I'm really regretting it. But, how do you commit to such a demanding thing with a nursing baby? I don't know what my point is. Maybe that I miss singing and especially feeling like I sound half-way decent when I sing. I kind of feel like I've lost part of myself or something.
Just needed a vent. Thanks for reading, or not. Whatever the case, it's out there. Now I need a good cry and I'll get over it. :)
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4 comments:
You are a great singer! I have had the privilege of listening to you tons. Don't sell yourself short. There will be other times to sing...next year you won't have a nursing baby. And Brandon has counselors he can and should rely on, don't ever feel you can't do something. And now, I think you should have a brownie...they always make me feel better!
I remember singing with you in the Syracuse ward - was this the first time since then? Because yeah, that would be a long time. I haven't sung in front of church for a while, either (my voice usually goes to crap while I'm pregnant), so I know how you feel about it being nerve-wracking once you get back up there. Choir IS such a commitment, especially with a baby, but you have the right idea in thinking that practice will make you more confident. Grrrrr...dilemma!! If only we had all the time we wanted to work on our talents. For example, I love to play the piano, and feel guilty that I don't play/practice more, but with small children, how do I find the time?! So there, now I've vented too... :)
I didnt even know you sang! What a good friend I am! Ha! I am sure you do a great job! I wouldnt have the confidence to get up and sing! And I am sure everyone appreciates that! haha! Have a good day! You are great!
Sarah,
I am not sure if you remember me or not. I am the Salt Lake Rayna in the Fox Family. Are you the Primary chorister? I am. If you are, do you have any fun ideas. I am so out of my element in this calling. Put me behind the piano anyday, but lead the music.....ARGH!!!! My sister in Ohio is in the same calling, maybe we can share some ideas.
my email address is rayna@teamabsi.com
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